After sexual betrayal, it can be difficult to rebuild trust and restore intimacy in a relationship. If you have done the betrayal, it can, at times, feel hopeless. As a woman, it’s even harder as there are societal constructs and perceptions that make the journey for relational recovery so much more challenging.

HCH offers a weekly group for women sex/porn addicts and women who have cheated on their partners. Here at HCH, we will never judge you or shame you as our goal is for you to heal from your pain and help you and your partner through this relational recovery process.

If you are a woman who has betrayed your partner, whether it be a physical affair or emotional infidelity, it can seem difficult to find support as you can sometimes feel like maybe you can’t fix things, even if both of you desperately want it to work.

If you have betrayed your partner and want to heal the relationship and feel stuck, this group is for you.

• I freeze when my partner is angry, and I don’t say anything at all.
• My partner tells me I don’t care about their pain, but that’s not true. I do care.  I just don’t know how to prove it.
• I become defensive when my partner is expressing hurt or anger, but I just can’t seem to stop myself.
• When I try to do or say the right thing, it doesn’t work.  My partner just feels worse.
• When my partner is upset, I get angry and then say what I think they want to hear.
• I am afraid to do anything because I’m scared I will make things worse.
• I feel like society has judged me and I feel so much shame.
• I have no idea how to respond to my partner when he is upset with me.
• I don’t know how to approach intimacy or communicate in a way that validates my partner’s pain.
• My partner is never going to trust me again. What’s the point?
• I feel like everyone will think my partner is weak for staying with me and I’m afraid that will cause my partner to leave. 
• When is it going to get better? I can’t do this dance much longer.
• My partner keeps asking the same questions over and over again and I don’t know how to answer and reassure them.
• I want to prove that I am sorry but I know my partner doesn’t believe me. 
• I feel like I’m walking on eggshells and at any moment it’s going to fall apart.
• I feel so much shame about how much trauma I have caused my partner and regularly shut down when I see them in pain.
• Maybe I just can’t be empathic and I’m just a lost cause.
• I wonder if my partner would be better off without me.
• I’m not doing anything wrong, but my partner keeps accusing me and checking everything. I don’t know what to do anymore.
• Why did I cheat? If I don’t even understand why I did it, how can I explain it to my partner?
• How do I reconcile the shame I feel about society’s view on women who cheat?

Michellene is a betrayal trauma specialist with a background and experience in prenatal & perinatal psychology and health (PPNE) and is credentialed in guiding and helping to heal relationships that have experienced high-conflict and betrayal trauma. As an Associate Member specializing in the Family Law Section of the American Bar Association, Michellene joins our team with a Bachelor’s degree in Global Leadership and Women’s and Gender Studies from the University of Oklahoma.  Michellene brings a wealth of experience and training in betrayal trauma, birth trauma, trauma-informed care, non-violent communication, effective parenting, sexual reintegration/intimacy (AASECT), and the betrayal trauma process and recovery.

Michellene uses the Minwalla Model approach with clients and understands firsthand that oftentimes we are thrown into situations we would never have chosen for ourselves. Michellene’s hope is that by serving as a resource for you while you regain your strength, she will help you to forge your path to peace, healing, and understanding. Regardless of where you are in the healing process and journey, Michellene will help you become informed, educated, and empowered, and realize the courage and confidence you have within.